The Street Slayers! - Chapter 1
by Justin J-Boogie Golden
Summary: See what happens when you take one part SF, one part The Slayers, and jumble them all together like you just don't care.


In the vast expanse of space and time, lay the realm of the universal keeper. This ethereal being had been set with the task of watching over all of the many different realms and planes of existence. He has efficiently performed his task with ease... 

Until one day, when in one of the many different universes, a planet lived it's last day and exploded brilliantly... and one of these many space particles made it to this being and went up his nose... causing him to sneeze. 

This wouldn't have been so bad, if he hadn't been handling two particular universes. And the resultant sneeze caused him to accidently meld them together. And for the first time in many many years... the being spoke. 

"Uh... oops." 

And of course, first words are always followed others. 

"Maybe nobody will notice..." 

------- 

The Street Slayers! - Chapter 1 

by Justin "J-Boogie" Golden. 

With the help of... the mighty SVAM C-Ko's Crew! Yeah, we tight! 

------- 

"Gourryu! Hey, wait up!" 

Gourryu, master of the Shotokan of Light, turned toward his partner and travelling partner, Chun-Lina Inverse, the strongest woman Street Slayer in the world! (Well, at least according to her). Gourry still thought that she needed to wear something other than the cheong-san that she usually wore. He thought it was designed to enhance the figure. 'And if it's one thing she doesn't have', Gourryu thought, 'is the figure for that.' 

"C'mon, Lina! I'm hungry already!" 

Chun-Lina finally caught up to him and swatted him upside the head, slightly mussing up his hair. "I told you to wait for me! Besides, you'd probably eat up everything in site if I didn't go with you!" 

Pausing to adjust his red bandana, Gourryu scratched the back of his head. "Yeah, so?" 

Chun-Lina stared at Gourryu for a second, then sighed and shook her head. "Never mind. Now come on!" And with that, she ran off down the path. 

Gourryu blinked a couple of times, then yelled after her. "Hey! I thought you were supposed to be following me!" And as he ran off after them, nobody noticed the tall shadowed figure standing in the trees. "Gourryu... at last I have found you. You will pay for what you did to me... I will have my revenge! BWAH-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" 

A passerby glanced at the shadow in awe. "Wow... is that a real witches hat?" 

The figure glared at the passerby. "Go away." 

Perturbed, the passerby walked off talking to himself. "Alright, fine. I could tell that you were bald anyway." 

---------- 

In the city... or was it town... well, the something of Cityburgtonville, it was pretty generic. You had your quality inne... places to dine... places to shop... the only thing it had going for it was the fact that it was able to tout the ability of rebuilding anything destroyed in it's city in 2 days, tops! 

But in one of the many diners, Gourry and Chun-Lina were busy fighting over who was going to get the bigger portion of the meal... well, not really fighting. If they did that, the place would've been in shambles. So, they were just arguing in their own way... 

Gourryu tried to concentrate on his meal as he ducked a high roundhouse kick from Chun-Lina. "Hey, watch it! You almost made me drop my beef bowl!" 

"That was MY beef bowl and you know it!" 

Finishing it off quickly, Gourryu dove for a hunk of beef but missed it as Chun-Lina snagged it and flipped away. "HEY! That was mine!" 

Chun-Lina smiled brilliantly as she brandished the purloined sirloin. "Didn't see your name on it!" She was about to bring it up to take a bite... until the wall exploded in towards the room, causing her to drop it as a damn tall, well muscled man wearing a pair of shorts, a cape, and a battered old witches hat strode in through the newly made door. 

"At last, I've found you, Gourr--URK!" 

His tirade was cut off as he was the new recipient of a full on Jewel Kick (that's a kick to the jewels if you're wondering) from Chun-Lina. "You made me drop a perfectly good, tasty, aromatic piece of beef!" 

Gourryu wandered over and looked down at the prone figure. "Hey, this guy looks familiar..." 

Chun-Lina blinked and looked at him. "Really? From where?" 

"Well..." 

The figure coughed a few times, then dragged himself to his feet. "I am Sagatulus... eternal rival of Gourryu!" 

Chun-Lina nudged Gourryu with her elbow. "Since when have *you* had an eternal rival?" 

Gourryu scratched the back of his head, then shrugged. "I don't remember having one, actually..." 

Sagatulus narrowed his one good eye, then pointed at Gourryu while yelling. "What do you mean you don't remember having an eternal rival?! Our epic battle still resounds in the hearts of all across the country!" 

Gourryu snapped his fingers, then slammed his fist into his palm. "Oh yeah! Now, I remember!" 

(Flashback time!) 

------ 

In a non descript background with the appropriate lightning and wind blown grass action, Gourryu and Sagatulus were locked in an epic battle... or so it seemed. 

Blocking a high side kick from Sagatulus, Gourryu dove under the following downward elbow thrust and struck Sagatulus in the face with snap kick into a straight punch combination. 

"C'mon! Why're you fighting me for anyway?! I'm so huuungry..." 

Sagatulus chuckled deeply, then leapt at Gourryu, grabbing him before he could react and driving his knees repeatedly into his sides. When he was done, Sagatulus kicked Gourryu away. "Because I thought you were a good fighter... and it looks like I was right!" 

Sagatulus held out his hands, palms facing each other as yellow tendrils of energy sparked back and forth between them... coalescing into a bolt of pure energy as he pulled his arms back and shot them forward, firing off the energy with a shout of "HOWLING TIGER SHOT!" 

Still recovering from being kicked all willy nilly, Gourryu stood up to get shot right in the face, causing him to fly back and skid on the ground. 

Taking time to savor his victory, Sagatulus then leaped into the air, intent on bringing his foot down to cave in Gourryu's skull. 

This wasn't the way it was going to end, no siree bob. 

Rising into a crouched position, Gourryu grit his teeth as he pulled his fist to his side. Concentrating for a moment, he snapped his head up to look at Sagatulus. "LIGHT COME FORTH!" And with that cry, his fist blazed with energy, then he cocked back and took to the air, fist extended with another cry of "SHOU HIKARI-NO-KEN!" 

Sagatulus was damned unprepared for that and took a wicked shot to the chest, opening a two foot gash in his chest which had the added benefit of knocking him clear out of the sky to slam into the ground on his back. 

Gourryu landed light on his feet as Sagatulus propped himself up on his shoulders, and touched his bleeding chest. 'He... he wounded me... the... the bastard must DIE!' Struck with rage, he got up and started a suicide run towards Gourryu, intent on ripping his head off. 

Gourryu meanwhile had one constant thought running through his head. 

'So... hungry... must get food... really... REALLY hungry...' 

Frustrated at his lack of eats, Gourryu started focusing for his final attack... bringing his hands to his sides, he cupped them as tendrils of lightning started sparking off his body. Ki started gathering in between his palms, giving off an eerie light of his own... Sagatulus, still blinded with rage, either didn't notice or didn't care. 

When his thoughts reached it's peak ('Gottahavefoodgottagetfoodneedfood... NOW!'), Gourryu swung his body forward and thrust forth his hands, firing off the mighty ki bolt with the almighty shout of: 

"GOHAN-KEN!" 

---- 

(Eeeend Flashback!) 

Gourryu was staring at the ceiling as he finished up his story. "And so, with him outta the way, I was able to make it to the nearest village and stuff myself silly. Ah, that was a good meal..." 

Sagatulus, who was doing a slow burn during the story, finally snapped. "And because of you, you caused me this!" 

Before he had a chance to point, Chun-Lina piped up. "Oooh! He made you lose your eye?!" 

"Uh... no..." 

"What? He made you lose all your hair?" 

"What?! NO! He gave me this scar!" And with that, he pointed. "Weren't you paying attention to his stupid story?!" 

"No... not really. I did hear something about the Shou Hikari no Ken. Hey, Gourryu!? When're you gonna teach me it?!" 

Gourryu sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "I told you, I can't do that! Only people who master the Shotokan of Light can weild it!" 

"Oh, come on! I won't tell anybody!" 

Tired of being ignored, Sagatulus stomped on a nearby table. "WILL YOU STOP IGNORING ME?!" 

The shop owner, who saw the whole thing finally strolled over and tapped Sagatulus on the shoulder. "Excuse me..." 

Sagatulus turned and regarded the shop owner. "Yes?" 

The shop owner handed Sagatulus a sheet of paper. "Here, your bill." 

Sagatulus read the paper... then fumed as a vein burst on top of his head. "What's this for?!" 

"For caving in my wall and destroying my table. I expect payment immediately, *or* you COULD work it off..." 

Sagatulus spluttered for a moment. "I... I..." He turned to look at Gourryu and Chun-Lina... but they were long gone. "They left! GRAGH!" 

Grabbing Sagatulus by the ear, the shop owner tugged him down to his level. "So, is it pay or work?" 

Grumbling to himself, Sagatulus swore revenge. "I'll get you Gourryu... and your flat chested girlfriend won't protect you this time!" 

----- 

On the road, Chun-Lina sneezed, causing Gourryu to glance at her. "You catching a cold, Lina?" 

Rubbing her nose, Chun-Lina shook her head. "Nah, musta been a dust mite. So, what're you going to do about your friend back there?" 

Gourryu stared at Lina blankly for a moment. "Friend?" Then a look of comprehension dawned on his face. "Oh! You're talking about the guy I fought!" 

"Did your mom drop you on your head as a baby?" 

"Not that I remember... why?" 

Chun-Lina sighed and placed a hand on her head. "Never mind. Forget I said anything. I still wonder how *you* of all people could be a master of the Shotokan of Light." 

"Yeah, it *is* cool, isn't it?" 

'He's an idiot savante,' she thought. 'He has to be. But I'll weasle his techniques out of him one way or the other. And then... and THEN I'll definitely be not only the strongest woman, but the mightiest warrior in the world!' 

Basking in her happy thoughts, Chun-Lina broke out into a loud laugh. 

"Hey, what's so funny?" 

Chun-Lina stopped laughing abruptly, then looked at Gourryu. "Huh? Wha?" 

"You were laughing. I was wondering what's so funny?" 

"Umm... it was a joke I just remembered!" 

"Ah... so, what is it?" 

Chun-Lina paused for a moment before slowly continuing. "I... forgot it again." 

A knowing look passed across Gourryu's face as he nodded. "Yeah, I have that problem at times, too. You get used to it." 

Chun-Lina gave Gourryu a small amazed look, then shook her head and kept walking. 

They walked for awhile before Gourryu turned to Chun-Lina again. "Hey, where are we head now anyway?" 

Pointing down the trail, Chun-Lina smiled brilliantly. "I'm glad you asked! Next stop, Saikyoruun!" 

----- 

What's next for out mighty heroes? And what about Sagatulus? Will he be able to pay off his bill and catch up so he can get his revenge? More importanly, does anybody *care*?! Tune in later for the next chapter of... THE STREET SLAYERS! 


End file.
